When it comes to sexual pleasure, the orgasm and difficulty in reaching it, spring into mind right away. Speaking of which, on behalf of so many women.
My idea is to bring this theme across, in an attempt of contributing to shed
light on likely solutions. Given that, it's such elusive subject as far as women
concern.
First of all, sexual maturity comes about with time and thus experience.
In one hand, it's not a matter of fades unlikely what some might hold true.
Apart from that, it takes a lot of experimentation in order to come to terms
with bodily and mind reactions faced with experience of such magnitude.
Sexuality makes presence from early stage, whether in the body or imagination.
While sex itself, only stages a performance around adolescence and thereabouts.
Before that, it would be not only premature as improper, as the body should
to be up for sex.
Coming to think of it, when a child adventures in a new experience in that
there's nothing to fear and be ashamed. Begins by talking gibberish, so everybody
finds it cute. Besides, as tooted by Vinicius de Moraes-"children sip shampoo,
suck on Gillett blades" with no fear of being happy.
I make this comparison in order to draw attention to the phase which generally
sexual acquaintance takes place. Perhaps one of the most difficult, whereupon
adolescents find themselves at peak of insecurity in respects to everything
that surrounds them, mostly their own body.
Interestingly, when a woman seeks out professional aid in orgasm-related issues
for the sake of sexuality or sexual relation, she would have tried
all there's in terms of old wives' tales, home brewed potions and even mambo
jambo to say the least. More often than not women who never experienced sexual
pleasure in ages of steady relationship. Once upon a cuckoo's time, a old timer
told me that "he would doubt any woman who would tell him that had already
experienced an orgasm".
On the other hand, most women when socializing or among friends, won't admit
having had difficulty in reaching sexual pleasure, all the way around.
As the social mask-figure of speech to cover it up come in handy. Many women,
when revealing concern, it's because it was already solved. Shame gets in the
way more than we can imagine. As for men, just victims of the situation, if
not invited to participate of the search for solution.
To Françoise Dolton accordingly, as it were the cure depends on the
woman. Thus, a woman who lets herself in for satisfaction by a healthy partner
would be likely to allow a narcissistic given and taken to set up. By letting
the other to fell the pleasure of inducing pleasure, other than satisfying oneself
sexually, ultimately satisfying the loved one.
Except for cases of difficulty due to vascularization problems, matters biologically
by due course, the first and foremost step towards effective improvement in
quality of sexual life for a woman ought to be tackled from day one.
Further, masturbation plays a major role for the sake of inherent physiological
reactions. It's a shame to modern-day but masturbation and female sexuality remain taboo-like as no go area between mothers and daughters.
I'm not putting my foot down meaning that women should expose themselves to
Harry-Dick and Tom whenever intimate matters crop up, otherwise, they could
be more open among themselves in that a trustworthy relation. After all, seasoned
women could help a great deal newcomers in the art of self-satisfaction.
As in any given trade, the most experienced supervise the novices, but for
the sake of sex, there are no induction courses as such. It would be
idyllic if sex could be regarded as something casual much like tooth
brushing. How many hygienists show their clients how to maximize care, but how
about sex? And the first time? How about the adolescents, unknowingly
where to search for clues for so many queries.
I strongly believe that Internet does a wonderful job for this public, lacking
of information and anonymous. It's easier said than done, mainly when it comes
to sex and love. The search is never one off, but several insertions.
Jean Starobinsky in his piece L'oeil Vivant, summons-" if passions get
aroused by sight and grows by seeing, it doesn't know how to satisfy itself,
the sight makes room to desire, but sight isn't enough for desire. The visible
space testify at the same time my potency of discover and my impotence of accomplishment.
It's known how sad the desiring look can be".
By Doris Ritter
Psychologist
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